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The Tuxedo

2002, Movie, PG-13, 95 mins

The Tuxedo: Review

TUXEDO, THE
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Feather-light and proudly goofy, this Jackie Chan action comedy appears to be aimed squarely at under-12s, smutty gags about kinky bimbos, tasty buns (including Chan's) and Jennifer Love Hewitt's breasts notwithstanding. Jimmy Tong (Chan) is a loser, sweet-natured but clumsy, uncoordinated and tongue-tied around women. "I thought you all knew martial arts," says a fellow cabbie, as Jimmy is getting his ass kicked by the angry bike messenger he just doored. "Not all Chinese are Bruce Lee!" Jimmy gasps. (That sly allusion to Chan's own early career is as clever as it gets.) Jimmy is a world-class taxi driver, though, and that skill attracts the attention of Steena (Debi Mazur), an agent for the shadowy CSA — no, not the Confederate States of America, some kind of fictitious cross between the CIA and the NSA. She gets him a job driving for James Bond-like super-spy Clark Devlin (Jason Isaacs), whose secret weapon is a classy version of the alien suit that turned a wimpy school teacher into costumed crime fighter in TV's Greatest American Hero. Devlin's tuxedo, a high-tech arsenal on a hanger, turns the wearer it into an uber-mensch who can outrun speeding cars, walk up walls, execute martial moves like, well, Bruce Lee and light a lady's cigarette in the blink of an eye. Devlin takes a shine to the big-hearted Jimmy, and when baddies in the employ of wicked water magnate Dietrich Banning (Ritchie Coster) put Devlin in the hospital, he cedes the suit to Jimmy. Jimmy pretends to be Devlin and teams up with new-to-the-field agent Del Blaine (Hewitt), who's been assigned to keep an eye on Banning. Devlin's late partner uncovered evidence that Banning was cooking up some evil plan for world domination, using his bottled water business as a front. Jimmy and Del must find out what it is and stop Banning before he brings a thirsty world to its knees (cue maniacal genius laugh). The bulk of the film's gags involve Chan's carefully choreographed pratfalls as the bumbling Jimmy tries to get the tuxedo under control. Most of the rest rely on silly sexual innuendo, and the lengthy opening sequence involving a sparkling mountain stream sullied by a prodigious flow of deer urine would meet with the approval of W.C. Fields, a vocal opponent of water drinking. leave a comment --Maitland McDonagh
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