Joan & Melissa LIVE at the Academy Awards5:30: I'm so glad my colleagues over at the channel have decided to go blue for the red carpet. Setting the tone for the evening, Joan Rivers begins with a slightly disturbing scene in which she spreads 'em for Matt Dillon in Crash and groans a lot. And she warns us that there are many more such scenes from the nominated movies to come. Next she gives a nod to Isaac Mizrahi's infamously presumptuous Golden Globes coverage at rival E!. "I would never be so presumptuous!" she declares while she pokes Lisa Rinna in the boob. Instead of groping her interviewees, she'll be using cards to indicate whether they are wearing underwear and/or have real breasts. This'll be interesting.
5:33: Joan gives her own thank-you speech tailor-made to offend her entire crew: "We are color-blind here at TV Guide. Right, black person?" Then she fills the time
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Additional postproduction needs have forced Warner Bros. to push back the Feb. 3 release of The Lake House, a romance reuniting Speedsters Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock. The flick will now open June 16, where it will face off against The Fast and the Furious 3 and the Viking adventure Pathfinder.
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Speedster Sandra Bullock and longtime beau Jesse James (star of Discovery Channel's Monster Garage, if that helps you any) reportedly surprised a few hundred loved ones on Saturday night by tying the knot at a ranch in Gaviota, Calif. At the dinner reception, guests were offered a choice of beef, fish or the promise of no Miss Congeniality 3.
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