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Sex With Strangers

2002, Movie, NR, 105 mins

Sex With Strangers: Review

SEX WITH STRANGERS
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Joe and Harry Gantz, who created the popular HBO series Taxicab Confessions, explore "The Lifestyle" — swinging — in this psychologically revealing documentary. They spent a year following three couples, all of whom profess belief in the Lifestyle's core credo: Everyone wants to sleep with people other than their spouses, but most repress that desire or act on it deviously. Their divergent experiences with sexual openness add up to a complicated picture of surprisingly conventional couples embracing an unconventional way of life. James and Theresa of Lacey, Wash., the elder statesmen (they appear to be in their late 30s), have been married and swinging together for years, bound by their shared love of the chase. Shannon and Gerard of Waveland, Miss., are also married and have a small child; he's nearly twice her age — she was 17 to his 32 when they wed — and she's a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. They started swinging on the advice of their marriage counselor (they had fidelity problems), but quickly find their expectations out of sync. Calvin and Sara of Olympia, Wash., are in their early 20s and live together (she's already been divorced once); swinging is like "being a single couple," Calvin enthuses. Over the course of the year, two couples weather major upheavals: Gerard's online flirtation with another woman sends Shannon into an emotional tailspin that requires hospitalization and psychotropic medication. Calvin introduces a second woman, Julie, into his relationship with Sara; the resulting ménage à trois turns their lives into a non-stop jealousy, insecurity and competitiveness-fueled psychodrama. Only Theresa and James emerge essentially unchanged, though Theresa has breast augmentation surgery that she hopes will keep her in the game as she gets older. While the blunt-spoken James initially seems like a jerk, his marriage to Theresa ultimately appears enviably solid and mutually satisfying. Calvin, by contrast, starts out looking like a shallow but likeable kid, then gradually reveals an unpleasant streak of passive aggression. "You have to be comfortable with what you're doing," is his answer to all Sara and Julie's qualms; he regularly reduces both to tears, then berates them for being emotionally manipulative. Shannon is the train wreck waiting to happen; it's a relief that she doesn't self-destruct before our eyes. The film is graphic without being lurid, and the naked emotions onscreen are far more shocking than the naked bodies — though there are plenty of those, in all shapes and sizes. leave a comment --Maitland McDonagh
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