This made-for-cable omnibus features three stories focusing on the African-American and Hispanic experience. Occasionally funny but never as shockingly provocative as the creators intend, these mini-movies confuse soapboxing with sincerity and spew out a portrait of white people that
compares with John Ford and C.B. De Mille's depiction of Native Americans.
In "Space Traders," a sagging US economy is given a potential boost when extra-terrestrial aliens offer a deal: unlimited wealth and resources in exchange for all the Black populace which they value for the melanin content in their skin. As the sole colored power broker in the presidential
cabinet, Gleason Golightly (Robert Guillaume) suffers the Uncle Tom label but he's assured that the official program won't affect his loved ones. Collaborationism backfires as Golightly is betrayed by Caucasian capitalists, and his family members are beamed aboard the spacecrafts. Destination:
Unknown.
In "The First Commandment", Puerto Rican priest Father Carlos (Nicholas Turturro) initially decries the white hierarchy of his Church for deciding to profit by selling a statue of the Madonna prized by a poor parish. After Santeria cultists protest the new location, the actual Blessed Virgin
begins appearing in crackhouses and performing miracles much to the displeasure of the presiding cardinal (Richard Herd). In the third story, the title character of Tang (Paula Jai Parker), a woman suffering from low self-esteem finally defies her abusive lover by refusing to participate in
another pharmaceutical trial. He is unprepared for Tang's gunpowdered response, echoed throughout the ghetto by all the other Afro-American women dealing with sexist oppressors.
Aiming for hipness, this sloppily-conceived anthology is really "In Living Color" with a burdensome social conscience. Shoddily executed, this tripartite urban nightmare wriggles under damaging shifts of tone and can't make up its mind whether it's party-crashing HOUSE PARTY or poised to DO THE
RIGHT THING. In its most promising segment, "Space Traders," a wealth of satiric possibilities are sacrificed for a glum diatribe about a ruling class of Simon Legrees. Despite traces of inventiveness, direction weighs a ton, and the performers lack bounce. Of interest for its background info on
religious cults, "The First Commandment" succeeds neither as a scary exploration of a minority sect nor as an irreverent parody of multiple Marian sightings. The most egregiously written and acted of the bunch, "Tang" is a socioeconomic horror story about battered women, yet it's socked across in
a broad fashion, devoid of surprise or even the smidgen of sophistication present in its companion pieces. "Tang" vulgarizes what should be rousing affirmation of freedom through violence. Advocating revolution at every turn, COSMIC SLOP only proves that, unlike freedom fighting, filmmaking does
require discipline as opposed to bulldozing force. If the creators wanted to pillory an entire race (Caucasians, of course, the new stereotype of evil incarnate), they should at least have done so with wicked invention. Revolutionary comedy demands a fresh arsenal of insults, but this film uses
rusty old weapons and the parodists' anger backfires. (Graphic violence, extreme profanity, adult situations, substance abuse.) leave a comment
