Conan The Barbarian

Sweaty, musclebound ode to mythic masculinity from right-wing ironist John Milius, featuring Arnold Schwarzenegger's first starring role in an action picture (if you exclude the execrable low-budget comedy HERCULES IN NEW YORK). Based on the adventures of Robert E. Howard's pulp hero, the film opens as the title character (Schwarzenegger) becomes a slave of the brutal murderers of his mother and father. When forced to take to the gladiatorial arena, Conan realizes he's a little stronger than the average guy. In no time he and some colorful friends set out to avenge his parents' deaths. The picture, however, never goes anywhere. A series of meaningless adventures pu...