From its ugly claymation credits to its inexplicable title, BRAIN DONORS is a profoundly unsuccessful, uncredited and extremely loose remake of the 1935 Marx Brothers classic A NIGHT AT THE OPERA that brings no credit to anyone involved with its production.
Wealthy and foolish widow Lillian Oglethorpe (Nancy Marchand) decides to honor her late husband's memory by founding a ballet company. To the fury of her stuffy lawyer, Lazlo (John Savident), she appoints opportunistic ambulance chaser Roland T. Flakfizer (John Turturro) director. He rashly
assures her he can sign up The Great Volare (George De La Pena), a temperamental, world famous dancer of indeterminate nationality. With moronic sidekicks Jacques (Bob Nelson) and Rocco Melonchek (Mel Smith), Flakfizer blunders through the world of ballet dancing, giving offense at every
opportunity and helping a couple of sweet young dancers (Spike Alexander and Juli Donald) get their big break.
That BRAIN DONORS (originally titled "Lame Ducks," which at least had some faint connection with the subject matter) has no plot to speak of isn't really the problem. Neither, after all, does A NIGHT AT THE OPERA. The problem is that it's extraordinarily unfunny, despite the strenuous efforts of
all involved. Surprisingly enough, those involved include the team of screenwriter Pat Proft and executive producers Jerry and David Zucker (fourth partner Jim Abrahams is missing), of AIRPLANE! fame. The world of classical ballet is certainly not without its absurdities; in fact, the ZAZ team
poked malicious and on-the-money fun at some of them in TOP SECRET! You'd think that between them they'd have been able to come up with at least a couple of funny bits, if not a coherently entertaining film. But the deadly elements in BRAIN DONORS outweigh the promising ones by a substantial
margin, and the results are excruciating.
John Turturro, best known for his accomplished work in such films as the Coen brothers' BARTON FINK and Spike Lee's DO THE RIGHT THING, is possessed of the sort of offbeat looks that often drive performers to comedy out of sheer self-defense. But looking funny isn't necessarily the same as being
funny, and Turturro isn't. He certainly gives his all, but the endless mugging, eye-rolling and frantic rushing about is merely exhausting. Bob Nelson specializes in whimsical physical comedy (often more annoying than amusing), while Mel Smith is a crude foil; Nancy Marchand and John Savident are
on hand to provide the sort of puffed up dignity that demands to be deflated in the crudest possible manner. As Volare, dancer George De La Pena rants and sputters through a dreary series of indignities (A NIGHT AT THE OPERA's famous stateroom sequence is restaged in his dressing room); he's so
colorless that it's shocking to recall that this was the star of Herbert Ross's overwrought NIJINSKY.
Director Dennis Dugan, of 1990's notorious PROBLEM CHILD (a purportedly comic twist on the BAD SEED scenario), shows no more flair for comic material than the cast. In all, BRAIN DONORS has little to recommend it. leave a comment
