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Blood Surf

2001, Movie, R, 88 mins

Blood Surf: Review

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Despite the cyclical popularity of fearsome crocodile/alligator movies, this toothless wonder is a monster flick that only a die-hard fan could love. As the public's appetite for televised thrills grows, producer Zach Jardine (Matt Borlenghi) trumpets his latest can't-miss idea: Blood Surfing. With his girlfriend and cameraperson Cecily (Katie Fischer), Zach intends to shoot daredevils Bog (Dax Miller) and Jeremy (Joel West) as they surf past schools of sharks. In the wilds of Australia, they persuade innkeepers Sonny (Chris Vertido) and Melba (Susan Africa), as well as their nubile daughter, Lemmya (Maureen Larrazabal), to point out the no-swim zones where sharks reign. But an unseen creature eats all three of the obliging locals, and Zach realizes the ocean conceals a mammoth beast that even the sharks fear. Happy to have been rescued from a croco-beast by Captain John Dirks (Duncan Regehr), a guide who initially refused his cooperation, Zach's crew doesn't bother to question his providential appearance. Instead of hauling the frightened outsiders to safety, however, Dirks sails after the sea-critter: Years earlier, Dirks was unable to save passengers on his excursion ship from becoming human sushi and intends to settle this old score, even if he endangers his current guests. Ravenous, the scaly menace attacks Dirks's vessel; as Dirks holds it at bay, Zach, Bog, Cecily and Dirks's girlfriend, Arly (Taryn Reif), paddle to shore. Can Dirks plant explosives in the belly of the beast or will the terrified survivors be forced to square off against the giant amphibian on land. This FX-laden film lacks bite: croco-zilla's dimensions are ludicrous and its leaps and bounds look as phony as can be. But even though it isn't nearly as much fun as an old Roger Corman horror movie, this movie can be enjoyed by fans as an inconsequential time-waster. leave a comment --Robert Pardi
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