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B*A*P*S

1997, Movie, PG-13, 93 mins

B*A*P*S: Review

B*A*P*S | BAPS
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A Cinderella comedy about two homegirls from Decatur, GA, and their adventures in LaLa Land, this crude cross between The Beverly Hillbillies and DISORDERLIES is almost painfully unfunny. Bored with their lives, best friends Nisi (Halle Berry) and Mickey (Natalie Desselle) flee to L.A. to audition for a Heavy D video and are tricked into helping the unscrupulous Isaac Blakemore (Jonathan Fried) bilk his dying uncle (Martin Landau) out of millions. But the girls and the geezer hit it off, and between Mickey's soul food and Nisi's lessons in water basketball, shopping, rap music and dancing, he's soon having the time of his life -- even crusty, overprotective butler Manley (Ian Richardson) is won over by the girls' unsophisticated goodness. Bidet gags, hair-weave jokes and vulgar, booty-flaunting fashions abound, but there's scarcely a snicker to be had. This poorly paced farrago contains so much expository dialogue voiced over static shots of the Blakemore mansion that one can only assume a series of desperate post production rewrites were commissioned in an attempt to fix the unfixable. It's a small pleasure to see eccentric, blaxploitation rhyme-meister Rudy Ray Moore back on the screen -- however fleetingly -- but otherwise this disaster is best left to vanish in peace. leave a comment --Maitland McDonagh
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