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Alien Arsenal

1999, Movie, PG-13, 90 mins

Alien Arsenal: Review

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REVENGE OF THE NERDS (1984) meets LASERBLAST (1978) in this underachieving high-school fantasy. Nerdy teen Ralph (Josh Hammond) is routinely tormented by bullies Flash (Krisztian Kovacs), Chad (Riley Smith), and Monty (Jerrod Cornish). While helping clean out the school basement, Ralph and his only friend, Baxter (Danielle Hoover), discover a secret chamber containing strange armor and weapons. In outer space, aliens detect their discovery, adopt human form, and arrive at the school as leather-clad, sunglasses-wearing "exchange students" Phil (Dominic Catrambone), Bill (Chris Olivero), and Jill (Stephanie Mennella). After seeing what the alien weapons can do, Baxter and Ralph use them to get even with the bullies. The aliens, meanwhile, enlist Monty's aid in retrieving their weapons, along with a power source that will enable them to download an "Armageddon Beam" that will eradicate all human life. It's up to Ralph to figure out a way to stop Monty and the aliens before it's too late. Director David DeCoteau (working under the pseudonym Julian Breen) borrows liberally from ROBOCOP (1987), MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS (1995) and any number of teen flicks, without adding any original twists of his own and, with the exception of an opening car chase, his action scenes are lackadaisical. The young actors are enthusiastic, though for bookworms Ralph and Baxter seem remarkably slow: It takes them forever to figure out that the laser-toting newcomers might be connected to the arsenal, and to realize where in the school Monty takes the power source at the end. leave a comment --Michael Gingold
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